The Makings of A Hotel Snob

When I was younger, I wondered why people became so picky about their hotels. If it had a bed and a shower then who cares?

Well, now that I'm traveling more often, I am beginning to blossom into a full-fledged hotel snob. Now, instead of spending a night in a hotel or spending a vacation in a hotel, I am spending my life in a hotel. And all those little things that don't matter for a night or a vacation become more pronounced when it's your second home.

There's the nice-to-haves, like softer facial issues (instead of sandpaper) or a thermostat (instead of low, medium, or blasting hot). My hotel at the moment as has a TV that doesn't turn on. The power button is just plain broken. Not the end of the world, mind you, since I am working round the clock on business - but annoying nonetheless.

Then there's the need-to-haves. For instance, right now I'm in a hotel with no clock in the room. Really? No clock? A cheap alarm clock would set you back, what, $5 per room. Lesson-learned: bring your own travel alarm clock.

Comfortable bedding. They have rationed me a single pillow in this room. Yes, I know I can call room service and get another one - but really? One pillow for a king-sized bed. What if I happen to mingle with the locals and bring back a girl - is she going to sleep on my stomach?

And then there's the strange. Last night, I slept in a sack. Perhaps this is a cultural German thing that I've never heard of, but I didn't have a made-up bed - they gave me a sack. Imagine a pillow case, but king-sized. Then inside the sack, I found a duvet that was too short for the bed. My feeling is that this is part of the German's war on sleep. The less comfort the better.

At one point, I swore never to become that guy who complains about his hotel room - but now that I am that guy, I am 100% okay with it.